Control Freak!!

In Giving control to God, I no longer feel out of control. Yet another seeming paradox in my faith, but it's true. I actually surprised myself with this statement yesterday. For those of you that know me, you know what a control freak I am. It's one of the reasons I make it my business to know everything about everything. By knowing as much as possible, I've been able to create the illusion of control in my life for a long time. In truth, I was in a death spiral; a self destructive path of trying to please anyone and everyone I possibly could (including myself). But as I spoke with Lisa yesterday, I mentioned my frustration with the lack of apparent direction in my life. Now that I am leading a Christ-centered life, I want that path to have a goal. She said something to the affect of how difficult it is to not want to take back the reigns after handing them over to God. To which I replied that I didn't want control. I just want Him to give a nice firm flick of the reigns so that my direction is made clear.

But even without that, I am completely confident that He is in control, His timing is perfect, and He will bless me beyond my wildest imaginings!! A far cry from the lost girl of a couple months ago. I was so hopelessly lost on my own, and now I revel in the peace of being FOUND!